Transformation

(A small update on me)

Transformation

They say that a scorpio’s life focus is transformation, death and rebirth. Its not something you really think about when you’re younger.

I had been through so many death and rebirth stages in my life that I really thought that I had come to the end of them. I thought I had worked out all of my trauma, past lives and ego etc.

I thought I had just about achieved everything I thought I had wanted, within reason.

That was the danger. That was the time where I did have to really dig deeper within . That was the time I had to fight even harder the forces of my mind, my programs and ‘time’, in order to find the spark ,yet again, to not just rise from the ashes unscathed, but to literally want to participate in the grand play of life, yet again.

I had been married when I was very young, I had been raised with restriction and authority, I had been pushed to achieve. I had two husbands that betrayed me, along with bodily sickness from stress and rejection.

Back then I could find the drive to heal myself at all levels because I had a one year old daughter and I knew I had the strength to heal myself and raise again for her. 

And that I did. I then went on to help and assist others with healing and teaching at all levels of physical , emotion, energetic and spiritual layers.

I had always had an adventurous spirit even though it was mostly suppressed by others and my circumstances, but I managed to create an academic scholarship in anthropology that allowed me to connect with other cultures and experiences.  I could not, however, conform to the mundaneness or authority of constitutions, nor the human disrespect for nature and animals.

I took to the rainforest to live quietly and simply with nature, and sought to prove to myself that I could handle the challenges of living alone in the jungle, while healing my past.

It seemed that each time I had conquered the death and rebirth process, I was either handed another, or somehow, unconsciously, I was busy creating another one. And so after twenty years I sold my self built home in the rainforest and came down off the mountain to live back in a society where planes soared overhead and noise from people flooded my senses.

While others were moving to further places to get away and grow vegetables , there I was leaving it to come back into the old life that I had struggled to understand or want to be a part of.

For some reason I had an urge to participate again, in the world somehow, and yet still on my own terms. I still wanted to cultivate the peace and connection with nature that I had achieved but I needed to participate in the wider world as well . Who was this new version of myself? Where did she emerge from? What is she thinking to let go of all the good work she had achieved. Perhaps it was the healed version of me that was now ready to extend and expand. The fool’s journey yet again ready for the surprise of the new? Or the hero’s journey ready to take back to the world, the treasure that was rescued from within?

And so yet again I was called to transform, but this time into something that I knew not what , into a space that I knew not where , and for a reason yet to be divulged to me. Just me and my Higher Self upgrading to something new!

I learnt a lot from the rainforest. I learnt that I was really a true part of it. But it took a long time to get to that knowing. The challenges were at times frightening , the isolation could be deafening and the rain and mould unforgiving. 

When your’e on your own in a place like that you really do reach out to the comfort and communication of nature. You learn their calls , their rituals and you hear the winds of change. Every plant, tree, animal and insect has a message to relate to you if you listen. Sometimes you just have to be watchful without trying. It comes when you least expect it like a gift that they truly are happy to present. Sometimes it can be sad as you see how human behaviour and ignorance impacts them. And yet, it is so heartwarming to know that they know you are there as they ask for help with situations that are challenging for them as well. 

I learnt most of this by myself and my inner reflection, although I was inspired to listen by the medicine men that I had worked with and was close to in Australia.

They encouraged me to see the forest and nature differently, and to hold a communicative space for them to speak. This also opened up my ability to communicate with animals telepathically.

I know it all sounds woo . I have been down the path of woo. But woo does not nourish deeply one’s innate desire for connection and true transformation into the highest possible reflection of ones self in this world. There it is , it has to be said.

Beyond the woo, the crystals and the la la 'kumbyah', there is a true path of self transformation and realization that will be so different for each and every person. 

Its only ever been about coming into a deeper / higher level of self realization / relationship with yourself. 

Its only ever really been about how you perceive yourself , your relationship with the world;

and how you create it accordingly.

Reach deep within and continue to transform into higher versions of you!

🌙✨ May you rise with grace into the arms of transformation, where the old falls away and your truth begins to bloom. Reclaim the sacred sovereignty of your spirit. Listen deeply to the whisper of your Higher Self, and walk the quiet path of self-realisation. From this inner temple, you will shape your world with clarity and purpose. If your soul is calling for more, I welcome you to journey with me—into the heart, into the mystery, into your becoming. 🌿💫

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